The cure💉 to Complex PTSD🩺

Folks,

It’s been a week of deep thought on my end of how I actually have a number of these signs. They might or might not be Complex PTSD, but they are surely things to address. I won’t name specific ones, but in total I relate with 6 of them. So close to the seven signs worry mark..yikes😬!

But one that I can say out loud is no. 11: → “We can’t afford to show much spontaneity. We’re rigid about routines. Everything may need to be exactly so, as an attempt to ward off looming chaos. We may clean a lot. Sudden changes of plans can feel indistinguishable from the ultimate downfall we dread.”

Oh man, you should find me cleaning the space around me when I’m tensed/anxious/overthinking/worried. It starts with me cleaning my desk, then my room and it ends up being every surface and room in the house. Every thing has to be in order. Every plate has to be well arranged in the cupboard. Every spoon accounted for and placed upward so as to dry off properly. Every little spot of dust I see offends me to the bone! Every. Single. Thing. Has to be right or my mind won’t be right. And it ends up with me taking off the clothes I’ve worn for barely half a day and showering completely unnecessarily, for me to also be ‘spotlessly’ clean. Then of course someone, almost immediately, destroys all the tidying I’ve done by making a complete mess. Yes, I am (or used to be) a clean freak. Always striving to be the perfect perfectionist. And this shows in my routine too. I can’t count the number of nights I’ve stayed awake up to 12 midnight just so as to sleep on the hour mark. A minute late, and I won’t enjoy the sleep come morning. I would count it as a wasted night. This has obviously been a major source of my unhappiness coz of changing routines. I want the same routine over and over again, but of course life ain’t that way. Not only routine but people, circumstances, environments, around me change all the time. And the moment I realized this late last year I started being an embracer of change. As sign 11 states, sudden changes of plans can feel indistinguishable from the ultimate downfall we dread. I realized the ‘downfall’ I dreaded wasn’t at all tangible or a reality. It was all in my mind. Nothing’s gonna happen if plans change. Maybe a little setbacks here and there, but not to the level my mind puts it. My mind puts it as if the world will stop suddenly and nothing will ever be the same again. Of course not. I guess it’s also coz all my life it had been a perfect routine since childhood up until late Class 7, when tragedies started attacking my life. Before, it had always been specific bedtimes and wake up times, same school term dates, same friends and family, and same school environments..the same routine for year in year out. But something in between changed that and I’ve been struggling for that same perfect routine for the longest while. But life often doesn’t get you what you want, it gets you what you deserve. And so I had to adapt. I had to embrace the change that had taken place in the world around me. Change is inevitable. I’ll throw in one of my mind’s most reiterated quotes, from Prison Break😁;

Aah I’ve digressed. One of these fine days though, I’ll write about the Einstein vs Darwin theory. It’s so intriguing..damn😋!

Anyway, once I realized I’m a ‘patient’ of no. 11 I started to trace back years to where this sense of perfectionism and rigidity came from, and accepted that change is inevitable.

So, what is the cure for the symptoms of Complex PTSD?

Partly, we need to courageously realize that we have come through something terrible that we haven’t until now properly digested.

I will quote directly form the source of this wonderful study:

The source article concludes:

PS: the source video for this series is from this 👉🏽 The School of Life’s Video. It’s even better with the graphics😍.

Have a wonderful week ahead!

✍🏽Reagan.